[ad_1]
Keep knowledgeable with free updates
Merely signal as much as the Life & Arts myFT Digest — delivered on to your inbox.
I’ve my New Yr’s decision prepared, and it’s to go to my homeland, Syria, for the primary time since I needed to flee it eight years in the past.
As a journalist who spent years reporting on the price of the Assad regime’s staggering scorn for human life and dignity, I couldn’t dream of going again to Syria so long as it remained in energy.
However in a stunning flip of occasions, it was Bashar al-Assad himself who needed to pack up and flee below the duvet of darkness final weekend, leaving the destiny of the nation and its individuals, together with those that spent years combating to maintain him in energy, within the arms of advancing rebels.
His defeat led to an finish to one of many worst dictatorships in historical past, a truth searingly confirmed by the harrowing clips popping out of prisons which have fallen to the insurgent teams. For the hundreds of thousands of Syrian exiles and refugees world wide, and people internally displaced, it signifies that we will lastly return dwelling.
The 11-day insurgent offensive that ended greater than 50 years of Assad rule coincided with the start of a visit I made to Rome, the place I reunited with a childhood companion of Syrian-Kurdish background. Collectively, as a substitute of admiring marble sculptures and savouring tacky pasta, we spent sleepless hours phoning household and buddies and watching the mighty Assad regime collapse on dwell tv.
About 20 family and friends members joined us by way of telephone after midnight on Saturday as all of us laughed and wept and began planning reunions in Aleppo and Damascus. My mom teared up as she greeted my buddies showing on different screens, whom she had watched develop up alongside me till this struggle scattered us world wide, and congratulated us on the daybreak of freedom. A Christian pal showing on one telephone display requested to speak to an Alawite pal showing on one other. They each joked concerning the many years the Assad regime spent fuelling sectarian tensions to solidify his rule.
The TV display in entrance of us was cut up in half, one half displaying the breathtaking clips of detainees leaving the infamous Saydnaya jail; the opposite displaying scenes from in entrance of the Syrian broadcast company, which rebels had seized to announce the autumn of the Assad regime.
I made it to France as an asylum seeker in early 2020, three years after I needed to flee from Syria, the place my work in journalism — together with as an unauthorised correspondent for a worldwide information company — had put me at grave danger of arrest and persecution. I’ve since striven to rebuild my shattered life on a extra strong basis, in a spot far sufficient from dwelling in order to permit me to discover a measure of contentment and aid.
I spent the final 4 years licking my wounds and going to extremes in shielding myself from my previous, which included progressively leaving social media, now not consuming any information besides that which impacts my family members and me straight, and abandoning all hope that I might ever see Syria once more. I introduced an indefinite break from Syria-related work, significantly in my area of journalism, and slowly started to fade away from the lives of relations, college and college buddies, till some started to view me as one who, having achieved an expensive European life, forgot who I’m and the place I come from.
The sorrow I by no means allowed myself to really feel, the intuition to show and look again that I by no means allowed to prevail, appeared to be ebbing away. However it all shattered on December 8, when my sobs echoed in hundreds of thousands of houses of those that had change into forlorn refugees world wide, squandering precious years striving for authorized statuses, going through racism and discrimination and fearing the specter of the far-right. Those that had been internally displaced inside Syria have been already shifting again to their houses, and the overwhelming majority of those that have been nonetheless dwelling below the tyrant’s direct rule have been lastly giving voice to their ideas.
In Aleppo, the place my household lives, they continuously spoke of the sluggish loss of life they have been experiencing. They have been among the many fortunate ones by no means to have been injured or displaced, however the burden of carrying the Assad dynasty on their shoulders was crushing any hope they’d of a dignified life.
Each Syrian to whom I’ve spoken is acutely aware of the perils that lie forward. However everybody additionally appears to agree that solely now, with Assad gone, can Syrians aspire to tackle foes and challenges collectively and eventually have their say.
Discover out about our newest tales first — comply with FT Weekend on Instagram and X, and subscribe to our podcast Life & Artwork wherever you hear
[ad_2]